Bearing Burdens in Our Love for One Another
Bearing Burdens in Our Love for One Another.
“Continue bearing each other’s heavy burdens. In this way you will be fulfilling the Torah’s true meaning, which is upheld by the Messiah Christ. Keep carrying one another’s overwhelming loads, and you will be truly obeying Christ’s Royal Law of Love. By your ongoing offer to stoop down and help shoulder one another’s crushing burdens, you will be completely submitting to the way Christ expects us to live.” (Galatians 6:2).
Bear (Greek, “bastazo”) – to carry, to carry off; to take away, to take up with your hands; to shoulder or share a weight. This word is in the continuous present tense, which means to continue doing so, an ongoing effort and not a one-time activity.
Burden (Greek, “baros”) – a crushing load; an extremely heavy weight; an overwhelming burden; an oppressive weight too heavy for one person to carry alone.
Fulfill (Greek, “anapleroo”) – to accomplish in its entirety; to complete; to perform fully; to observe perfectly.
Law of Christ (Greek, “nomos”) – the teachings of the Messiah that highlight the intended meaning of the Law of Moses; Christ‘s words in the Gospels that clarifies the heart of Torah; the set of biblical expectations established by Jesus that reveals what the Lord had in mind in the Hebrew Scriptures; the spirit of the Law of Moses behind the letter of the Law, as expressed by Jesus Christ.
Bearing the Cross. Why was burden-bearing so near and dear to Paul’s heart, so much so as to believe that when one bears the burdens of others, one in fact is completing the expectations of Christ? Perhaps Paul focused on burden-bearing because this human act of love perfectly described what Christ did on the Cross for our salvation. The whole point of Christ’s burden-bearing was to heal and ransom us out of His profound love for us. Burden-bearing represents and demonstrates God’s love for us, and summarizes all that he did on Calvary. So when we bear the burdens of another, we are participating in the love Christ has for others. When we pick up our cross daily, we can’t help up but bear the burdens of others. “Surely it was our weaknesses He carried; it was our sorrows and our pain of punishment that weighed Him down. God has placed on Him the guilt and sin of us all… Through what He experienced, my Righteous Servant will make many righteous, in right standing before God, for my Servant bears the burdens of their sins.” (Isaiah 53:4, 5, 11).
The Premise. Caring for others reflects the heart of God, and is grounded in the Biblical fact that all human life is sacred. There is a shared human dignity between all people, regardless of race, health, age, faith, status, station in life, the country of origin. Burden-bearing begins with those closest to us… our spouse, our children, our extended family, our church community, our neighbors in need, in that order. Any father or mother who, through a personal distance, or indifference, or overwork, or arrogant disdain, doesn’t bear the burdens of those closest to him/her in a personal and profound way, then that person is disobeying Christ. That person will not fulfill the law of Christ. That person does not reflect the heart of God.
“This is my command: Love one another the way I loved you. This is the very best way to love. Put your life on the line for your friends. By this all will know you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (John 15:12-13; 13:34-35).
We are inescapably social creatures. We are made in the image of a Three-Person’d God, and are designed for interaction and community. We need each other, we are bound to live with other people, and we all need lessons on how to do that in a healthy and life-giving way. Living a life together with others begins at conception and doesn’t even end with the grave. The question is how do we live this life together, how do we navigate through a life with others without doing permanent damage? Better yet, how do we live together in a way that reflects the Kingdom of Christ?
Jesus’ word to the wise is to simply love one another with agape love. But what does that look like on a daily basis? In any community in which we live, whether at work, at home, in church, in a small group, with a cadre of friends, we need help and heavenly knowledge on how to get along, how to thrive with each other. And this is when the One-Another’s come into play. The epistles love to unpack what love looks like. Scripture explains that love is when the Spirit of Jesus is put into practice, especially with one another.
If a thriving community is a shiny diamond containing many facets, the One-Another’s are those facets. The One- Another’s reveal what it looks like to lay down your life for your friends, to put your self on the shelf in a daily martyrdom, sacrificing yourself for someone else’s benefit out of love. In other words, bearing burdens in a spirit of love. These One-Another’s described below describe what it takes to live in a healthy community. With the transforming power of the indwelling Holy Spirit, we can indeed enjoy a life together that reflects the eternal Kingdom of God, a community that has a heart for one another and bears each other’s burdens.
Be Kind to One Another. Ephesians 4:32 ask believers to, “Be kind (“chrestoi”) to one another, tender-hearted and compassionate, forgiving each other as God through Christ forgave you.” Kindness is generous and considerate actions for the welfare and happiness of others; simple acts of compassion to bless others; practical helpfulness that meets a need; the love that manifests itself through acts of service and good deeds; gracious acts of goodness; soft-hearted concern for another. “Love is kind” (1 Cor 13:). In the Aramaic, “kindness” is translated as “sweetness.” Perhaps kindness is love’s sweet flavor, compassion’s sweet aroma, and mercy when it is ripe for the taking. Kindness is sweet-natured, unassuming, leans toward simple and basic deeds of service, and is often overlooked by others when being demonstrated. Christ-like kindness makes the world go ’round, even though it so often goes under the radar. Even though underrated, sweet kindness is its own reward, and has the sweetness of God as its source and inspiration. Excerpt from Jewish Morning Service: “Let us this day, as on all others, find grace, favor and mercy in thine eyes, as in the eyes of all who see us; and requite us with acts of loving kindness. Blessed art thou, O Eternal, who bestoweth loving kindness upon his people Israel… O give thanks unto the Eternal, for he is ever kind, for his mercy endureth for ever. Thou, O Eternal, wilt not withhold thy compassion: thy kindness and truth shall ever preserve me. Remember thy mercy and kindness, O Eternal, for they exist from everlasting. Suffer us, O Eternal, to behold thy loving kindness and grant us thy salvation. As for me, I do confide in thy mercy, my heart delighteth in thy salvation. I will sing unto the Eternal, for he hast manifested loving kindness unto me.”
Harmonize with each other. Romans 12:16 advises, “Live in harmony with each other.” What does harmony look like? It’s when Christian siblings agree to be agreeable, to adjust to each other in order to fit together. To live in harmony is to be of like mind as you seek mutual understanding. Just like in music, when separate parts intentionally combine into a beautiful whole. When Christian believers live in harmony, they reconcile apparent differences into a combined unity. It’s when they join together to form a pleasant union of spirit and purpose. In community, different musical notes can fit together and make a harmony, something beautiful that will add depth to relationships.
Bear with one another. Ephesians 4:2 tells us, “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” To bear with each other is simply to put up with each other, to make allowances, to willingly endure each other in good humor. It’s to know when to step back and not take each other too seriously. It’s to tolerate each other’s little weaknesses, to accept each other despite those blind spots or minor mistakes. To bear with each other takes patience and forbearance and a certain amount of light-heartedness. Usually, believers in tight quarters discover pet peeves they didn’t know they had, and they discover irritating things about themselves that they hadn’t noticed before. Just work through them honestly, lightly and compassionately. When people live or worship together in community, bearing with each other is a sign of true love. Allow each other to be human, with all its weak moments and interesting little habits. Treat the imperfections of others the same way that you would want them to treat your imperfections, with understanding and forgiveness and good humor. Bear with teach other.
Exhort each other. Hebrews 3:13 tells us to “Exhort one another daily, while it is called Today.” To exhort each other is to be each other’s spiritual cheerleader, to be each other’s guidance counselor. To exhort a Christian sibling is to urge to continue in the Faith, to come alongside him/her to inspire courage and hope and direction. To exhort your fellow believer is to call on him/her to reconsider a decision if it is warranted. There are times we all need to be exhorted, to rethink things with depth and wisdom. What better person to exhort than a fellow Christian who trusts you and probably understands you better than anyone else? Everyone in a Christian community needs to really trust each other here, that the other isn’t speaking out of judgment or frustration, but out of love. It’s important that the person being exhorted is also affirmed and encouraged. This is an important ministry to each other in any church, community or home, and calls for sensitive interaction in the spirit for understanding and discernment to occur.
Confess to each other. James 5:16 simply says, “Confess your sins to one another.” When you confess to each other, you acknowledge your mistake openly with a brother or sister. It’s when one believer freely admits the wrongdoing to the other. To confess to your trusted friend in Christ is to privately announce one’s guilt, one’s shortcoming or failure of character. When you concede your wrongdoing, you are humbly agreeing that the mistake you made was indeed a mistake. Your wrongdoing may not have been intentional or conscious, but it probably still needs to be confessed. One will no doubt feel somewhat vulnerable when confessing a wrongdoing. But once again trust kicks into gear here. If a fellow believer is confessing to you, listen with love and understanding, not judgment. Scripture repeatedly warns us about the dangers of concealing an offense, of keeping a wrongdoing a secret. Confession is good for the soul, and it is good for a personal relationship as well as life in community. It keeps one from self-deception, clears the conscience, provides peace in the spirit. Confession renews your innocence. The Passion Translation’s version of that James passage seems tailor-made for life together… “Confess and acknowledge how you have offended one another, and then pray for one another to be instantly restored, for tremendous power is released through the passionate heartfelt prayer of a godly believer.”
Honor one another. Romans 12:10 encourages us to, ‘Take delight in honoring each other.” To honor a spiritual sibling is to highly esteem and greatly respect the other. It is to focus on the innate worth and dignity of the other, to show deference to the other. It is not mere respect, though. It’s way beyond that. It is to revere the spouse because of God’s love and because of the fact the other person is made in the image of God. Each person has a defining identity as a created being. Every person wears a crown of honor by virtue of being hand-made by God Himself. Each person in a community should try to outdo the other in showing honor to the other. Honoring one another brings deep delight, satisfaction, and the fulfillment of honoring God by honoring what He has made. Honor one another, giving the other what is due because s/he is a child of the King. So lift up every person every chance you get and honor their precious worth before you and before God.
Bear one another’s burdens. Galatians 6:2 advises us, “Bear one another’s burdens, and in this way fulfill the way of Christ.” Can you see how important this one another is? There is something about carrying another’s burden that reflects the deepest part of the compassionate heart of God. To bear a burden means to lift up and carry something, sometimes intangible and sometimes tangible. It is bearing something that is weighing down the other person. It is to take up and walk with the other’s burden while you live your life. If something is weighing heavily on someone near you, offer to help carry that burden. Helping to bear the troubles of another way of tangibly caring for that person. By bearing a burden, we are actually shouldering the yoke of Christ, and when partnering with Christ this way, the burden will be lighter for the other. Any person who, through an emotional distance, or personal disdain, or selfish indifference, refuses to bear a burden of the other in a meaningful way, is actually disobeying Christ. That friend or spouse or parent or teacher is not fulfilling the way of Christ. Bearing burdens reflects the very heart of Jesus, who bore the burdens of our sins at the Cross. At the very least, perhaps the most practical ways we can bear a burden is through active listening with a heart of understanding, and genuine prayers of intercession, carrying the other person’s concerns and troubles directly to the Lord of grace and mercy.
Encourage each other. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 simply says, “Let us encourage one another.” It’s interesting that the Greek word here for encourage is “paraclete.” It is one of those rich Greek terms that has multiple applications in English. Paraclete can mean encourage, comfort, console, advocate for, counsel. The word paraclete actually means at its root the idea of coming alongside another person to help. Jesus gave the Holy Spirit the nickname Paraclete in the gospel of John, the Helper who comes alongside us when we are in need. So Christian believers are asked to be little paracletes, who come alongside the other to encourage, to advocate for, to comfort, to counsel. To encourage someone literally means to place courage in the other. Christians are called to come alongside each other and place courage in him/her, to comfort one another in a way that inspires hope, to advocate for the other in a way that gives strength and confidence. Fellow Christians, encourage each other.
Wash each other’s feet. In John 13, Jesus tells His disciples, “If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash one another’s feet.” Back in the day, foot washing was a menial servant’s task, involving the placing of someone else’s dirty, smelly, sweaty feet into a bowl of water, and carefully cleansing those feet of all dirt, grime and sweat, then drying the feet with a towel. It was a lowly act of service, a menial task of hospitality and common care of a guest. In community life, there is nothing too lowly when it comes to serving each other. It is putting humility into practice, and demonstrating for each other the spirit of servanthood that is so vital in a home or church. For believers, there is nothing too menial or dirty as you care for each other. Taking out the trash? Check. Unplugging the toilet? Check. Cleaning out the gutters? Check. Fixing the hair-filled bathroom drain? Check. Picking up the dog poop and cleaning the cat urine? Check. Believe it or not, when you wash each other’s feet in this way, our community becomes sacred ground. Perhaps it’s not even a bad idea to literally wash each other’s feet from time to time. If the Lord of the universe could do it, so could we. Foot-washing can easily be seen as a holy sacrament.
Warn each other. Colossians 3:16 instructs us to “Let the Word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom.” To admonish is simply to warn, to caution, to place into another’s awareness a fitting word of caution. To warn is to call attention to something that needs rethinking, to offer sound advice and guidance. Sooner or later, there will come a time when one believer needs to offer a fair warning to another believer. Everyone needs to be admonished at times, to be cautioned and advised. This is not a time when the warning is given out of arrogance or being a know-it-all. Instead, fair warnings are offered in a spirit of humility and compassion. If someone in the Faith is going down the wrong road, our turning a blind eye reflects a lack of love and attention. A warning always involves telling truth in love (Eph. 4:5). Wise words timely given to a teachable heart will only strengthen your community. Verbal alerts given in grace and truth could be life-changing. And isn’t that one of the purposes of community life, to help each other become better people? Warn one another, and remain alongside each other as difficult decisions are made. Warn each other out of loving concern.
Restore one another. Galatians 6:1 says, “If someone in the fellowship is overtaken by some sin or mistake, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness.” To restore literally means to set right, as in resetting a broken bone; to repair; to refit; to mend; to rejoin; to bring back to its original state; to heal. So to restore someone means to set a relationship right after a breakage, to repair a union that was broken, to rejoin what has been pulled apart. To restore a fellow Christian while in life together is to be bring that person back to the community, thereby bringing that community back to the original state of unity. If someone has made a mistake that has broken trust in some way, and needs to be restored to the fellowship of your home or church, it is important to engage in that restoration. If trust has been broken in a major, serious way, such as unfaithfulness and abuse, restoration may not be advisable or even possible. An abused or jilted spouse is not obligated to restore a spouse who has done those evil things. Spouses are never meant to become betrayed lovers or victims of abuse of any kind. The best picture of restoration is when the waiting father is standing along the road with his arms open, ready to receive the prodigal son, and then the father welcomed him and restored him into the home. At some point, we will all need to be welcomed and restored by the Father, and the wise believer can have a hand in that.
Build Up one another. Romans 14:19 advises us to “Eagerly pursue what makes for harmony and the building up of each other in mutual edification.” Edification is just a fancy term from the word “edifice,” or building. So, the word here is, do whatever it takes to build up each other in the community. Help each other mature, make each other stronger, help construct a community of love, a building of faith and character. To build up is to empower, to strengthen your fellow believer so s/he can stand with stability against the strong winds and storms of life. In any Christian community, each person is a partner in the construction business, building each other up through peacemaking and unselfishness and encouragement. To build up a spouse means to help your spouse discover what is life-giving to him or her, and then helping that spouse to make it happen. To build up others is to help them discover what is life-giving to him/her. Build up, not tear down, with words and actions that edify, not destroy. And in your construction business, make sure you use the one unshakable building material that will hold up the whole building… love. Build each other up.
Love each other. Jesus told His disciples in John 15 to “Love one another. Love each other the way that I have loved you.” We don’t start with loving the world. We start with the home. The world’s biggest hypocrites are those who seem to love everyone else but those closest to them at home. All these one-anothers mentioned are one way to unpack what that love looks like. And here’s another way… Love the way Jesus loved. Christ’s love was a readiness to bless, and a readiness to forgive. Wherever Jesus went, He blessed. He pursued whatever was best for the other person… a healing, a wise word, scripture, encouragement, a prayer, a meal together. Jesus blessed whomever He saw, whoever He met. He wanted what was best for each person. So pursue what is best for your fellow Christians, and make your house, church, or community a stable place of blessing for each other and whoever else comes inside. And then there’s forgiveness. Because you are both human, there will be ample opportunity to learn how to forgive. Some things are unforgivable in a marriage, such as breaking the vows in unfaithfulness or abuse. But let’s face it, most of the daily mistakes are forgivable, and can soon be forgotten after the forgiveness. Make your community a haven of grace and forgiveness. Love with Christ’s love, agape love, love that can only be provided by God, because we don’t come by it naturally. We need His love of divine extravagance, brimming over with blessing and forgiveness. Love the way Jesus loved, with the love of Jesus Himself. Love one another.
The Nature of Agape Love. The kind of love spoken of by Jesus in the Gospel of John is not your garden variety human love. John quotes Jesus as talking about agape love in particular. Jesus calls us to love one another with agape love. Agape is the highest form of love, it is divine love, straight from heaven, from God Himself. Agape love has no conditions… I will love you if. Agape love has no hesitation… I will love you when. Agape will not fade away and lose interest because of familiarity. Agape love will never strengthen in power, because it is never weak in the first place. Agape offers love to those who didn’t earn it, even to those who reject it. Agape is permanently loyal, almost to a fault. Agape love treats the recipient as if they had an intimate relationship, even when no such relationship exists. Agape is the ultimate expression of God’s nature, the essence of His character.
The most virtuous person on the planet cannot manufacture agape, as if it’s merely a highly esteemed human trait. It is a divine trait. We don’t have it in us. We aren’t born with a natural ability to show agape love. We can’t demonstrate it under our own steam. It can only derive from God, not human nature.
“For we know how dearly God agape loves us, because He has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with agape love; God has poured out His agape love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit whom He has given us; We can now experience the endless agape love of God cascading into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who lives in us!” (Romans 5:5, various versions).
Spilling Over. This divine agape love pouring into our hearts is intended to be demonstrated to others, redirected, much like God’s agape love was intended to first reach us. This affectionate regard poured into us is to splash onto one another. Agape love spills over from our hearts only after being poured into our hearts. Through the indwelling Holy Spirit, showing agape love to one another can become second nature in us, displacing our old loves… money and things; pleasure and power; self and attention. In some beautifully mysterious way, the unconditional love from above us is somehow completed when Christians love one another with God’s love. Agape love is the means by which God builds community, transforms the individual believer, and serves the world. Agape love is the distinguishing mark of a Christian, and the defining character of the community. Love one another with agape love.
A Life for One Another. Agape love is the distilled summary of all the 617 commandments of God. And bearing burdens completes Christ’s idea of what love looks like at the divine level as on the daily level in life together. So all the One-Another’s above are a practical way to understand what burden-bearing looks like.