Jesus Asks a Question: “Do you love Me?”
Jesus Asks a Question: “Do you love Me?”
The Grand Inquisitor. Messiah Jesus was a Master of asking questions: some were open-ended, others were very pointed; some were out of curiosity, others were challenging; some seemed rhetorical, others seemed painfully obvious; some were to reveal Himself, others were to guide the other into self-understanding; some were intentionally provocative, others were to kick-start a conversation; some questions were asked to explore a topic to deepen understanding and stretch toward the truth; some were leading questions that He designed to suggest a particular answer, and others were questions in response to questions asked of Him; some were hypotheticals to stimulate the imagination, other questions were used by Him as stepping stones to think logically from one point to the next. Jesus used questions to dignify the listener, letting that person know that He is taking that person seriously and listening carefully. Many of His questions were acts of friendship and used to pursue a more profound intimacy with someone. Jesus asked very few yes-no questions, and since time was usually irrelevant for Him when He was with people, He rarely asked a “when” question. Several biblical scholars have studied the gospels with Christ’s questions in mind, and they have literally counted a total of 307 questions in His various conversations and teachings. It seems that a worthy spiritual exercise when considering the many questions of Jesus is that we ask ourselves… should I take His questions personally, as if He was asking us that question right now?
The Question. “Simon Peter, do you love me?” (John 21:15-19).
Context. “After this, Jesus appeared again to the disciples, this time at the Tiberias Sea, the Sea of Galilee. This is how he did it: Simon Peter, Thomas (nicknamed “Twin”), Nathanael from Cana in Galilee, the brothers Zebedee, and two other disciples were together. Simon Peter announced, “I’m going fishing.” The rest of them replied, “We’re going with you.” They went out and got in the boat. They caught nothing that night. When the sun came up, Jesus was standing on the beach, but they didn’t recognize him. Jesus spoke to them: “Good morning! Did you catch anything for breakfast?” They answered, “No.” He said, “Throw the net off the right side of the boat and see what happens.” They did what he said. All of a sudden there were so many fish in it, they weren’t strong enough to pull it in. Then the disciple Jesus loved said to Peter, “It’s the Master!” When Simon Peter realized that it was the Master, he threw on some clothes, for he was stripped for work, and dove into the sea. The other disciples came in by boat for they weren’t far from land, a hundred yards or so, pulling along the net full of fish. When they got out of the boat, they saw a fire laid, with fish and bread cooking on it. Jesus said, “Bring some of the fish you’ve just caught.” Simon Peter joined them and pulled the net to shore – 153 big fish! And even with all those fish, the net didn’t rip. Jesus said, “Come and dine! Breakfast is ready.” Not one of the disciples dared ask, “Who are you?” They knew it was the Master. Jesus then took the bread and gave it to them. He did the same with the fish. This was now the third time Jesus had shown himself alive to the disciples since being raised from the dead. (John 21:1-14).
The Lead-in Question. “Friends, haven’t you any fish?” The word used here for ‘friends’ actually means ‘little children.’ This question from an unknown man standing on the beach no doubt sounded odd to the disciples in the boat. The word He used here, though, is labeled by NT scholars as “an affectionate term of the spiritual father to his committed disciples.” So, the disciples would have immediately understood this strange question once they recognized Jesus, their spiritual father.
Anglers for Jesus. NT scholar Raymond Brown once said that, “Never in the Gospels do the disciples catch a fish without Jesus’ help.” We’ll only succeed when we have Christ at our side through His Spirit. If He is not helping us, participating with us, whatever we are doing is doomed to failure.
More Than Enough. Someone on the beach counted out 153 big fish! Here once again we see that Jesus doesn’t like to skimp on His grace, He doesn’t seem to worry about being economical in His provisions. The disciple had an abundant catch of fish once they obeyed Jesus’ instructions, another example of His divine extravagance. He loves to give more than enough. God is over the top when it comes to the overflowing grace and superabundant blessings offered in Christ. God is not economical when it comes to grace and truth. His generosity surpasses all forms of measurement. God is not stingy with His blessings. He has an endless supply of grace and joy and forgiveness. He generously provides more blessings than we need. He seems to almost waste precious blessings and spiritual riches.
“Lordship includes Fellowship.” (Grant Osborne). Isn’t this sweet and brotherly gesture of providing breakfast after a long night of fruitless fishing… Isn’t that an amazing and welcome quality of Christ’s character? Wouldn’t we all like to have been a part of that breakfast?
Come & Dine (feat. Alex Vitug) (Live) – YouTube
“COME and DINE”
(Refrain) Come and dine, come and dine, you may feast at Jesus’ table all the time.
He who turned water to wine,
To the hungry, still He calls, Come and dine.
(1.) Jesus has His table spread, where the saints of God are fed,
He invites His people, Come and dine.
With His manna He doth feed and supplies our every need,
Tis sweet to sup with Jesus all the time.
(Refrain)
(2.) The disciples came to land, thus obeying Christ’s command,
For the Master called to them, Come and dine.
There they found their heart’s desire, with the fish upon the fire,
And He satisfies the hungry every time.
(Refrain)
(3.) Soon the Lamb will take His bride to be ever at His side,
All the host of heaven will assembled be.
Twill be a glorious sight, all the saints in spotless white,
And with Jesus we will feast eternally.
(Refrain).
(song by Charles Widmeyer, 1907; original title, “Jesus has a table spread”).
Peter was the leader of the Twelve, and probably the closest friend to Jesus during their years together. He was brash, impulsive, impetuous, and yet was faithful to Jesus throughout their ministry. He was the first disciple to declare that Jesus was indeed the Messiah, the Son of God, the disciples’ first confession of faith in Jesus. Peter was given the amazing privilege of being present at the Transfiguration. He once declared that he would never desert Jesus, and would rather die than abandon Him. And yet, there he was sleeping while Jesus suffered in the Garden. He couldn’t seem to do anything right that fateful night. With good intentions he took up a sword at Jesus’ arrest, and was quickly rebuked by Him. He promised to never deny Jesus, and he soon broke that promise by denying Him three times. He first denied knowing Jesus; then he denied being one of His followers; then he denied even knowing what those accusers were even talking about. After these denials, Peter went off by himself and wept bitterly in shame, humiliation and guilt. At this point, Peter was a big disappointment, to himself and to Jesus. Yet there was Jesus in mortal agony on the Cross, asking for the Father to forgive those who had a hand in His Passion. There is no doubt that Jesus had Peter in mind with a number of others. Father, forgive Peter, for he doesn’t know what he is doing.
Triggering the Memory. “There on the beach Jesus had breakfast ready. It would be the last meal they would ever share together, here on earth. They didn’t know that yet, but it would be the Last Breakfast. There had been another encounter across a charcoal fire, in Caiaphas’ courtyard when Peter denied Jesus, not once but three times before the cock crowed. And now, with the smell of charcoal all around him, he stands in his guilt and shame across a charcoal fire on the beach with Jesus. And the significance of this breakfast for Peter was probably the most poignant moment in Peter’s life and ministry. Because that breakfast of grilled fish and bread was laid out across the charcoal fire.” (from a sermon by Rev. Billy Strayhorn).
Shame. Peter felt bitter shame to the core of his soul. He denied he ever knew Someone who was his best friend, someone who trusted him for years. After his three denials, Matthew reports that “he went out and wept bitterly.” (Matt. 26:75). Peter wept tears of sorrow and remorse, of profound guilt. The following beach scene after Jesus’ resurrection should be seen in the context of Peter’s deep shame and how Jesus led him to the inner healing he needed so badly.
The Restoration. “So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, ‘Simon son of John, do you love (“agape”) me more than these others?’ Peter said to Him, ‘Yes, Lord; You know that I love (“phileo”) you like a loyal friend.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Feed my lambs.’ Jesus said to Peter a second time, ‘Simon son of John, do you love (“agape”) me?’ Peter said again to Jesus, ‘Yes Lord; You know that I love (“phileo”) you like a loyal friend and brother.’ Jesus said to Peter, ‘Tend my sheep.’ Jesus said to Peter the third time, ‘Simon, son of John, do you love (“phileo”) me?’ Peter was grieved because Jesus asked him three times, ‘Do you love me?’ Peter said a third time, ‘Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you like a close friend and brother.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Feed my sheep.’” (John 21:15-19).
Unfinished Business. After their fellowship time at the breakfast cookout, Jesus was very intentional about repairing the damage of Peter’s denials. Jesus wonderfully, with insight and wisdom, gave Peter three times to confirm Peter’s love for Him. Did Jesus astutely plan on speaking with Peter with the smoke of the charcoal fire in the air around them? If smell is our strongest sense and what brings our memories to the surface, was the charcoal fire at the beach helpful to bring about Peter’s redemption, reminding Peter of how he needs his relationship with Jesus to be restored? Three times to profess his love, three times to be assured of Jesus’ forgiveness, three times to be restored, not only in Jesus’ eyes, but also in the eyes of Peter himself. Jesus gave Peter the chance to redeem himself through these three questions. Jesus removed the cloud of Peter’s denials, and in the process put the nails in the coffin of Peter’s shame. Jesus helped Peter to silence the crowing of the rooster that surely was blaring in his spirit. Jesus proceeded to display confidence in Peter, revealing that he believed in Peter enough to ask him to be the shepherd of the Christian community soon to develop in Jesus’ absence. Peter said Yes to Jesus… Yes, Jesus, I do love you; yes, Jesus, I will feed your sheep and lead your people. Yes, Jesus, I commit myself to serving you for the rest of my days. This is a profound story of Peter’s redemption.
Love. This fascinating conversation between Jesus and Peter involved two words for love… agape love and phileo love. Jesus asked Peter twice if he loved Him with a deep, unconditional and devoted love (agape). Both times Peter responded with a phileo love, which means a personal affection like for a close friend or brother. The third time Jesus recognized that Peter at this point is not ready for agape love, but instead perfectly willing to love Jesus with phileo love. Jesus knows though, that Peter would faithfully grow into a deep agape love for Him to the point of sacrificing his very life for Him.
Peter is a solid representative of a human being, with his fears, his impetuous behavior, and his weak moments as well as his courage and redemptive qualities. The Bible doesn’t shy from exposing all of this regarding its historical characters. Peter’s denials are in all four gospels, right out there for all the world to see. Each of us could easily have done the very same thing as Peter in the high priest’s courtyard. If we have, it’s important to remember that Jesus is the God of forgiveness. Jesus is the shame-breaker. Pray that we can learn from Peter and develop long memories that will help us to scorn shame and revel in Jesus’ forgiveness on our road to redemption.
Taking the Question Personally. Jesus is asking each of us every day, “Do you love me?” Do you love me with unconditional loyalty and devotion, with agape love? Keep living into the agape love I pour into your heart through my Holy Spirit, and you will truly love me with agape. Maybe you love me with more of a brotherly love, like an intimate friend. That’s good enough for now. For, I am indeed your Brother, and I am your intimate Friend. Keep living into that phileo love, and I will transform it into agape love in due time. So all of us who seek to follow Jesus need to answer His daily question by living our lives for Him in His power and in union with Him. We flesh out our love for Jesus by remaining a living sacrifice for Him, thereby proving our love.
Full Disclosure Regarding Agape vs. Phileo Love: There are many New Testament scholars who believe that, like the original Greek term, agape love and phileos love can overlap in meaning and are relatively synonymous, especially in the Gospel of John. Phileos, brotherly love, is sometimes called agape’s “fraternal twin.” This makes sense to a certain degree, since there could be a fine line between a deep, affectionate brotherly/sisterly love and a sacrificial, unconditional love. At least we can easily say that we can have both kinds of love for the same person. It’s not a stretch to say that the agape and phileos loves are bosom buddies, since Jesus said the Father loves us with a phileos love (John 16:7). Jesus also said that the Father loves Him with a phileos love (John 5:20), and that He loved his best friend Lazarus with a phileos love (John 11:3), not an agape love. But for the most part, agape seems clearly to be distinctive from the other kinds of love in Scripture. Agape remains divine love that is unconditional, sacrificial, active, universal and a total gift from the heart of God. The fact remains, agape love is the highest form of love that God gives to us and that is intended for others through us. Sometimes the Greek language is not as perfectly clear as we would like it to be, not as precise. The original Greek term of agape was much messier, and included all the kinds of love combined in the term. Sometimes that imprecise history to Greek terms is carried forward, and we’ll just have to continue to trust that we are receiving what God wants for us from the inspired Scripture.